He Works All Things Together

This is part four of my story of how I got to Bolivia! If you’d like to read the other three parts, you can find them here, here, and here. 🙂

A year and a half ago, all my dreams came crashing down.

My dream to go to Central America. My dream to be on the mission field. My dream to work with orphans. I was two days away from seeing all of that realized, and it was all stripped away.

Before the stripping came, in the weeks leading up to my intended departure for Nicaragua, I became more and more excited to go. Preparations had me dreaming of the ways God would use me and the ways He would change me. My love for Nicaragua and the people I would meet there surprised me, and made the pain of letting go all the more piercing.

I knew that the Lord had a purpose in the midst of all that. I determined to cling to that, even if I never saw the reason. Sometimes I would wonder if I should have pursued Nicaragua at all, but the Lord gave me a deep assurance that at no point had I strayed from His will. So I moved forward, wondering what He was up to, but leaving everything in His hands.

The Stage Set

A dear friend of mine, Ruthie, was in town as I was walking through all this. This little point of trivia will become important soon. 😉

When I couldn’t go to Nicaragua that summer, I decided to attend some education classes at Ellerslie. There I met Dani, a fellow teacher and lover of Jesus. She also got to walk with me through the end of my Nicaragua journey, and became a sweet friend.

I continued to live life, walking in simple obedience each day, learning to live for Jesus in ordinary life.

At some point in all of this, I heard about a friend who had been able to spend time serving a family on the mission field in the Middle East. She primarily taught the kiddos so that the mother was able to focus on learning the language and serving the people. I thought to myself, That’s what I want to do on the mission field someday.

The Story Unfolds

Throughout my journey with Jesus, I’ve always felt a conviction that I shouldn’t pursue missions. I should live faithfully for Jesus and take whatever training I could get for missions, but not take the initiative in getting on the field. I don’t know why the Lord has lead me in that way, and I certainly don’t think that’s what everyone should do who wants to become a missionary. And maybe someday the Lord will lead me to actively pursue being with a certain organization or being in a certain place. For now, my story has been one of waiting, resting, and watching God work everything together.

Last year, in the fall, Ruthie and Dani went on a trip to visit a children’s home in… you guessed it… Bolivia. While they were there, they learned that the missionaries heading up the orphanage really needed a teacher for their kiddos, so that the mama could put more of her time and energy into the children’s home.

At some point during the trip, they both thought of me. Ruthie told me a month or two later about the opportunity, which lead to me being introduced to the Yoders, which lead to me flying to Bolivia.

The Curtain Pulled Back

Sometimes disappointments hit us and we never know why. I feel like I’ve had a special privilege in getting to see how my disappointment with Nicaragua lead me to the place I’m at now, and prepared me for the place I’m in now.

It’s beautiful that I’ve been so slow at getting my backstory out there, because just this week I realize another big way that Nicaragua prepared me for right now. Bolivia is currently in political turmoil. Violence in the streets, protests, blockades, food shortages. These really haven’t affected me all that much, but it is pretty bad in other parts of Bolivia. As I write this, the American embassy currently recommends that American citizens leave Bolivia.

This could have caused me to plummet into a whirling mess of “WHAT DO I DOOOOOO.” But I’d already thought through that. I’d already decided how far I’m willing to go. I’d already learned the leading of the Lord and how to know when He’s saying stay and when He’s saying go. I’d already counted the cost, learned that Latin America often has protests like this one break out, processed what it might mean if I were in the midst of one.

All because of Nicaragua. As things started to escalate here, I didn’t have to go through the same wrestling and figuring out of things that I had to last year. I already had a framework in place for civil strikes – which I’m guessing a lot of American’s don’t have, haha.

So not only did God use Nicaragua to being me to Bolivia, but He also used it to prepare my heart for what lie ahead. And even now, I know He is preparing me – and you! – for everything He is going to lead us into next.

The delay in having my dreams fulfilled caused some extra specifics to be added on. Now here I am, teaching in South America, serving, learning from, and living very closely with a missionary family, and getting the immeasurable privilege of loving and serving orphans. And so God worked out everything for my good, something I know He will continue to do, above and beyond all I could ask for or imagine.

The Desires of Your Heart

Friend, live for Jesus in every day. It is the small steps of obedience that we take in the ordinary that eventually take us down the path to the extraordinary. Put Jesus Christ first, dear ones, and everything else will fall into place.

Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4, NASB

His love for you is so great, He’ll likely even give you those dreams you thought didn’t matter – like seeing the stars from the Southern Hemisphere. Or encountering a wild tarantula. Or having a pet scorpion. And those can be the most fun sometimes, because it comes as a delightfully awe-striking surprise when you’re so caught up in love for Jesus that you don’t even see Him fulfilling those desires until you have them.

I think our God likes surprises.

November 20, 2019 15

The Lord Directs His Steps

This is part three of the story of how I ended up in Bolivia. You can read part 1 here and part 2 here!

Once upon a time, I thought teaching sounded like a trap. Like a job that would induce teeth-grinding, hair-pulling, frustrated sighs, and misery in general.

Yeah, I was that against it. Ha. And I’m so glad I was wrong. Toward the end of my first year of teaching, it became so clear to me that I had a gift for teaching and that it brought life to my soul. I was ready to spend the next several years, if not the rest of my life, teaching with the school and the students I had so learned to love.

And that’s when I received news that almost turned my world upside down. Actually, it’s more accurate to say that I misunderstood news and that almost turned my world upside down. I thought that the school I was teaching at was going to close for good.

Death and Resurrection

Even though it ended up not being true and the school is still running to this day, the Lord did wonderful things in me through my misunderstanding. After school that day I went to my room and surrendered the place and people I do loved to the Lord. I realized that the reason it hurt so much was because I loved the people around me so much, loved my students to much; and I resolved them and there that I would love them more and more, even if it meant a greater pain in the end.

A little after that time spent with the Lord, I had a meeting with a mentor. She asked me how I was doing, and I broke down in tears. As she listened to my story, a verse came to her:

The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.
Proverbs 16:9, NASB

I had planned my way, but now it seemed that the Lord was directing me elsewhere.

Her next question changed the course of my life, “Have you ever considered world missions?”

My dream of missions, that I had laid to rest, came blazing back to life. She gave me some information for a ministry in Nicaragua, and several months later I was connected with them.

Death to one dream resulted in the resurrection of another; even though the dream that I thought had died came back to life the next day when I realized the school wasn’t closing after all. And a year later, I was ready to go to Nicaragua for six weeks, and step into the beginning of the dream born in my soul over a decade before.

This Isn’t Over Yet

Then in the weeks before it was time for me to go, civil unrest broke out in Nicaragua. I wasn’t afraid; I knew that if it was to Nicaragua the Lord was leading me, He would see to my safety. But things grew worse and worse there until hospitals had to begin turning people away because they were so full. It was decided that I wouldn’t go to Nicaragua, two days before I was supposed to fly out.

I was crushed. But as I lay in bed, crying to Jesus, the Comforter brought Scripture to my mind: “You are good and what You do is good,” “As for God, His way is perfect.” The one verse that brought me the most comfort, though, was Proverbs 16:9. I had planned my way. Clearly, the Lord was directing my steps elsewhere.

One of the pastors in my life told me, “Olivia, this isn’t over yet.” For a while I clung to that as Gods promise to me that Nicaragua would still somehow happen. That the door would open again. But it became clear that that was a door I wasn’t to stand beside and stare at. It had closed, and I had to move on.

But it truly wasn’t over yet. Because the greatest disappointment of my life set everything in place for God to do exceedingly, abundantly beyond all I had asked for or imagined. But I’ll save that story for part four. 😉

October 30, 2019 12